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HELLO! WELCOME

Hello! Welcome to my website. Here you'll find all about me, my interests, works and achievements. Feel free to contact me. Thanks again for visiting my site! First, let me introduce myself. I'm Bidisha, a 18- year old girl from the leafy suburbs of Tamluk, West Bengal, India. I completed my 10th and 12th boards from Rajkumari Santanamoyee Girls' High School. Currently I'm pursuing B.Sc honours in physics from Midnapore College (Autonomous). I'm a passionate writer and enthusiastic about climate and sustainability. I'm an active member in an international youth- led environmentalist organisation named ClimateScience. I have also written in Climate Spectrum, journal of another youth-led organisation named Clim-Sci. Diagnosed with severe depression, bipolar disorder and psychosis at 14, I spent a lot of my life suffering from mental health issues. Now I've left the darkest time behind, and write to raise awareness about mental health.  Nice to meet you! Explor
Recent posts

The Eyes of Light | The Promise

  The night is darkest, perhaps; But see, there dreams the sun at the horizon.  Look in front of you. Countless mountains rise high and steep,  Adorned with howling blizzards are they; Their feet are washed  With oceans, roaring with waves... But please, don't stop; Don't forget this little girl, your promise to her! The storms will bend you, The lightnings will blind you,  The rain will drench you completely,  The earthquakes will shake you to the core... At every moment you fall, With each step you bleed more, At each breath you feel you can't,  You're exhausted to the last drop of yourself... But please, don't stop; Don't forget this little girl, your promise to her! Sometimes you see some light  In utter darkness, and rush... Only to discover it to be, a total illusion! You fall in the darkest, blackest abyss, To be painted red with your pain, and Trying in vain to erase all with your tears... But please, don't stop; Don't forget this little girl, yo

Bengali works | অগ্নি - কন্যা

  আয় রে আমার কাজ্লা মানিক, আকাশ ব্যেপে ঝেঁপে আয়! তপ্ত পাষাণ বুকের 'পরে পড় ঝরে তোর হৃদ্ - ধারায়! সোনা - ভরা ঐ আঁচল পিছে কত কালশিরা মর্মে তোর, যুগে যুগে ক্লেশ কশাঘাত হানি করেছে কোমল অঙ্গ ঘোর! সুখ - সকালের নীল বসনা! মুখ বুজে সব যাস সয়ে, বুকফাটা তোর রক্ত ধারা ঝরছে সোনা রোদ হয়ে! উজল হাসির তপ্ত ফাঁসি পরবি কত গলায় আর? ছিঁড়ে ফেল ফাঁপা সুখের মুখোশ, টুটুক শিকল হৃদ - কারার! লজ্জাবতী লতা আমার! কাঁটার বর্ম জাগিয়ে তোল! পড়ুক ফেটে তোর ব্যথা, হয়ে অত্যাচারীর কাঁদন - রোল! আর সোনা নয়, হীরক - তীক্ষ্ণ বিদ্যুল্লতা তোল গলায় নরম স্বরের ভীম হুংকারে কাঁপিয়ে দে আজ এ ধরায়! অনেক হল বেদন - গরল নীলকণ্ঠের হাসি হায়, লাজ ছেড়ে আজ হিয়ার বরিষ দগ্ধ চোখে ঝরাই আয়! © All rights reserved.

The Eyes of Light | The Life II

  Glimpses from everyday life, designed with quotes.  Check it out! ●  I am what I am. And I am never ashamed to be that, because I never betray myself. ● ●  Sometimes solitude is the best company, and silence the best music.  Because that's when your heart sings to you, and the universe interacts with you through yourself.  ● ●  If you want something with all your heart, and dedicate your whole soul for that, There's nothing, nothing in the whole universe that can stand against your way to achieve it.  ● ●  Bloom for yourself.  Because the fundamental soul of universe incarnates within you; and pleasing yourself, you can feel the pleasure of whole universe.  ● ●  There are some pains so agonising that you can't bear alone, yet can't seek help in shame and fear of mockery.  Believe me, even death feels less painful than those.  ● ●  Smile today, if only for yourself.  Because it is your own self who stood with you at the darkest of times when everyone else had left.  ●

Unspoken Tears | Humane

  ⚠️ Trigger Warning ⚠️ Sensitive photos and text. Stay away if you're too feeble-minded.  --------------- Blood be upon your accursed competition! Blood be upon brilliant career! Blood be upon you all! To over-ambitious humans. A vampire? Bloodthirsty thing? You are sad, you are in pain, and you cry. You are blessed.  Because your tears don't bear any stigma. They make you human, if only a trifle weak. What if each and everybody directs at you For your tears? What if your own pearl-drops tarnish you?  What if your inner You too surrenders To accept them as your own fault?  What if a helpless You make them pity Only to mock you from behind later? This is when blood replaces tears. More colorful, the ruby-lumps are Much stronger a liquor.  And you can still smile, if only a facade.  They appreciate the appearance of happy and strong You.  They badge you a warrior, beneath that, a loser. You yourself have accepted that.  Yes. I am a vampire, and I am proud to be.  Because no hum

Bengali works | তব চরণের তলে

  একদা সাজাতে চেয়েছিলে মোরে স্বর্গ- ফুলের মালায়, চিনিনি তখন, ফিরিয়েছি মুখ অনাদরে অবহেলায়, মেতেছি রঙিন নেশায়, ভুলেছি মিথ্যে প্রলোভনে! তাই কি দিতেছ সরিয়ে আজিকে নিদারুণ অভিমানে? নাহি অধিকার, জানি, তবু আজ সকল লজ্জা ছেড়ে মন চায়, তব অঙ্গন মাঝে ধুলোয় লুটিয়ে পড়ে তব অমৃত চরণের তলে দিই সঁপে এই প্রাণ! হয়ে যাক ম্লান যত নিষ্ফল সফলতা, সম্মান! নিজের বুকের রক্তে জ্বালিয়ে আশাহীন আশা- বাতি বৃথাই চেয়েছি পার হতে কত বেদনা- নিবিড় রাতি, দিব্যবিভার ঝর্ণায় যবে সিক্ত করেছ প্রাণ, আঁধার ভুলেছি, পিয়েছি তোমার অমৃত- জ্যোতির দান! ক্লান্ত নিশীথে একাকী আঁধারে নিষ্ফল ফল- ডালি সাজিয়েছি নিজ বেদনার দানে, নীরবে অশ্রু ফেলি, যে রাত্রে তব বাহুডোর মাঝে নিয়েছ আমারে টেনে শত চন্দ্রের ঘুম টুটে ধরা ভেসেছে আলোর বানে। আর সব রাত ফুরোলে, ফুটেছে উদয়- রক্তলেখায় অনিশ্চিতের আগমন বাণী ধূসর মেঘের গায়, যে প্রাতে নূতন অরুণের আলো ভরেছে কনক- কিরণে নিজেরে পেয়েছি তব ছায়াতলে, তব স্বপ্নাঙ্গনে। এনেছ ছিনিয়ে মৃত্যুর মুঠি হতে এ শাপিত প্রাণে, আশিস- পরশে জাগিয়েছ ব্যথা-শলাকারে শক্তিবাণে, আলোকদাত্রী মহিয়সী অয়ি! তবুও চিনিনি তোমা! আ

Bengali works | পুষ্পের প্রতিশোধ

  সুদূরাগত কোন এক অজানা আলোর বার্তায় শীর্ণ বিবর্ণ হয়ে গেল প্রশান্ত গম্ভীর অন্ধকার বেদনার ধূসরতার মত মলিন আকাশের পটে  রক্তলেখায় লেখা হল নতুন দিনের আগমন।  শীতল বাতাস শিশিরের স্পর্শ বুলিয়ে দিয়েছিল যাদের চোখে,  তারা ধীরে ধীরে জেগে উঠে প্রস্তুত হল  নতুন সূর্যের আবেশ দেহে-মনে মেখে নিয়ে  ফুলের মত ফুল হয়ে ফুটে উঠে,  সৌন্দর্যে বর্ণে সৌরভে আকাশ বাতাস ধরাতলকে  উজ্জ্বল সমৃদ্ধ সুসজ্জিত করে তোলার জন্য।  এক কোণে একাকী এক ফুল — শতবর্ষের সঞ্চিত বেদনাভারে নত, ক্লান্ত বিধ্বস্ত মলিন তার দিক থেকে  ঘৃণায় চোখ সরিয়ে নিল সুশোভিত পুষ্পরাজি,  তার ব্যাকুল বিষণ্ণতা থেকে সযত্নে নিজেদের বাঁচিয়ে  রূপে আভিজাত্যে প্রভায় পল্লবিত হয়ে উঠল তারা।  এক অজানা সুতীব্র বিরাগ বা বিতৃষ্ণায়  কোন সৌন্দর্য আর তার কাছে ঘেঁষে না — তাকে দেখে রঙ হয়ে ওঠে বিবর্ণ, রূপ হারিয়ে ফেলে উজ্জ্বলতা, হাসি পর্যবসিত হয় অশ্রুস্রোতে। শুধু দেবসম এক বৃক্ষ কৃপার উচ্ছিষ্টটুকু দিয়ে তাকে ধরে রেখেছে শুষ্ক নীরস এক শাখার প্রান্তে,  যেখানে জীবনের চোখে খেলা করে মৃত্যুর স্বপ্ন, সূর্যের নূতন আলো ধরা দেয় শোণিত-আভা হয়ে, স্নিগ্ধ বর্ষা আনে অশ্রুর লবণাক

Bengali works | লহো অঞ্জলি মম হৃদ্ - কুসুমে

   বসুধার বুকে অরুণ আলোকে পুষ্পিত শতদল দিব্যলোকের কিরণে সিক্ত স্নিগ্ধ সুশ্যামল, শীর্ষে যাহার জ্ঞানের মুকুট, অঙ্গে স্নেহবলয় সেই আমাদের স্বপ্নতীর্থ‌, মোদের বিদ্যালয়। মহাবিশ্বের সুধা যেথায় বিমূর্ত রূপ ধরে লক্ষ জগৎ আলোয় মিলায় এক হতে একাকারে দীর্ঘ নিশার আঁধার ঘুচায় রবির অভ্যুদয়, সেই আমাদের স্বপ্নতীর্থ‌, মোদের বিদ্যালয়। চির আলোকিত বিদ্যালোকের অনন্ত কিরণে  প্রাণ হতে প্রাণ সিঞ্চিছ তব স্বর্গীয় অঙ্গনে, হরষে-বিষাদে কঠিনে-কোমলে কত শত নব প্রাণ  ভাঙিয়া আবার গড়িয়া করিলে চির সুন্দর অম্লান — স্বপ্ন তরঙ্গে হানিলে আঘাত নিদ্রিত অন্তরে বহ্নিশিখায় দূরিয়া দুর্বলতার অন্ধকারে, অন্বেষি যত অন্তরলিপি স্নিগ্ধ মধুর দিশে  সুপ্ত অঙ্কুরে বিকশিলে তুমি ফুলে ফলে স্নেহাশিসে। জীবনের পথে করিলে ন্যায় ও সত্যে বলীয়ান, শত আঁধারের মাঝে উজ্জ্বল সুদৃঢ় অটল প্রাণ, শিখাইলে জ্ঞানের আলোকে দূরিতে হিংসা, দ্বেষ, ও গ্লানি, কলুষ নাশিতে, হাসি ফুটাইতে, বিলাইতে প্রেমের বাণী। পথহারা কত অভাগীরে তব কোলে দিলে আশ্রয়, কঠোর আঘাতে চূর্ণিলে কত জীর্ণ মলিনতায়, আশাতীত কত স্বপনের পথে করিলে আলোকচারী দানিলে জীবন, মৃত্যু-করাল গ্রাস হতে উদ্ধ

The Eyes of Light | Never To Be Alone - Discovering Yourself as a Part of This Universe Spiritually

स घा वीरो न रिष्यति। (The Brave never Perishes. - Rigveda 7.4.7) A victim of severe depression, bipolar disorder and psychosis since 12, I spent a lot of my life struggling with myself. I bled inside from repetitive stabs of pain, bled outside from efforts of escaping from pain. I felt death slowly approach me responding to my calls, but for some strange reason it never touched me in spite of breathing in my neck. The mythology of Nachiketa in Upanishad will tell you that if you come back from death, you know a lot more about life. I'll never say I know a lot about life, but I see it from a new perspective now. That everything you go through in your life leaves an imprint on you. It may be as little as seeing a full moon in a cloudless sky. You don't realise that just then, but it resurfaces back into you later. Sometimes it hits you so suddenly that you feel overwhelmed, and sometimes so calmly and gently that it has a soothing effect almost. And all along you're making

Stylus of the Green | The Emblem Of Life

Third place winner in ClimateScience Global Community Poetry Contest, April 2023 The night began to melt in day, The darkness in sky began to fade away In the first glow from the skyline.... He wasn't there to awake at the end of night.  The red globe lifted its head  From its under horizon bed And flooded the world in shine from heaven.... He wasn't there to bathe in first light. Across the field swam the breeze  To its rhythm danced the grasses The birds sang to the beauties.... He wasn't there amidst all those delight.  The sky was dressed in sapphire blue, At her crown a topaz was glowing like fire, We were sweating while walking along the street.... He wasn't there to shade us from heat. Perhaps the sky realised all? In the afternoon she changed to   Her mourning dress of dark black.... She spread white flowers in memory of him And wept, wept profusely over his death, Her cry reverberated through the atmosphere.... The wind joined the mourning,  She prayed for him

Dream of A Young Heart | The Blessings of Paradise

Winner in Summer Writing Contest 2023, Little Authors The light again began to come back to her eyes. She could see and hear again. She stretched her almost numb hands and felt the sheets upon which she was lying. It was wet. She brought her hands in front of her and was startled for a moment. It was blood. Slowly she swept her eyes around her. The sheets was drenched in blood, so was her clothing.  She felt no pain, no sickness, nothing. Rather she felt more relaxed and energetic than ever. So where did all this blood come from? Suddenly her fingers brushed her chest. She realised her chest was covered with several deep, horribly deep wounds. They should have hurt severely, but surprisingly there was no pain at all. She seemed to have crossed the realm of pain and sorrow. All of a sudden her fingers closed upon something cold and metallic. She held it in front of her eyes and immediately recognised the black mass of metal that was lying beside her. Everything began to surface in her m

Unspoken Tears | Stronger Than All

In This Mental Health Awareness Month, Let’s Stand Beside Them May is International Mental Health Awareness Month. A victim of severe depression, bipolar disorder and psychosis since before teen years, and a suicide attempt survivor for multiple times, speaks about helping others like her. She sits alone whole day, crying. You call her a show-off, or attention-seeking. Her pain appears through scars on her arm. You call her fiendish, or crazy. One day she drifts to heaven by her own hands. You call her a sinner, for "she destroyed her life gifted by God", or "she gave this grief to her family". You call her a irresponsible, or loser. But, have you ever offered her any help? Have you ever given her any chance to stand back, to return to the road of winning? So, what right do you have to call her a loser? She asked you for a small helping hand. A little sympathy. A little support was all she wanted. What did she get from you except negligence, indifference and mockery

Black Pit of Darkness | The Dark Truth

Everyone today thinks of it as a dream place. A place almost everybody knows as a place where all wishes come true. Still, I can't help but smile at them, smile at their blessed ignorance. Because I know the hellish truth about it. I know what a terrible, dangerous, dark place it is. And I again feel what a mercy it is not to know about some things— because not everything on this Earth is for everyone, and it is better to stay ignorant of some things. When I first completed the necessary processes, I couldn't help feeling something on my back, because I couldn't forget the vile things people spoke about the place. Still, suppressed excitement won over that natural alarm, and I felt too confident to keep myself safe from bad things.  The first few days went well. I used to go and spend quite some time there. I met several new people, who were all nice and friendly. I always tried to prove myself and quite succeeded in that— in no time at all I got a bunch of good friends who

Stylus of the Green | A Message From June, 1989

Third place winner in ClimateScience Global Community Story Contest, September 2022 Waking up in my grass bed, I winced in pain. I looked at my body. I barely had any golden colour left on my skin. I know, I don’t have much time. Perhaps this very day I’ll drift to peace. So I’m relating the story of my life. Long ago, it wasn’t like this. We lived happily here, hopped around to catch insects, and danced in the rain. The mountain was a paradise for us then. But everything began to change. The weather began to get drier and drier. There was hardly any rain; if any, it brought only more heat. In that foul weather, a deadly fungus began to grow quickly, spreading an epidemic in our population. My parents, siblings, friends all perished to that fungal disease. But I’m not heartbroken. Because I know, I’ll be reunited with them very soon. Everybody in our colony is gone. Perhaps I’m the last survivor of the golden toad species. But I know what has brought this disaster. My best friend told

The Eyes of Light | Sing for Humanity

  We were born in Earth, we're children of her, Come, all siblings! Let's sing for that mother.  May not matter our races and religions We're all human, be that our identity.  Come hindus , come muslims , come christians ,  Come! We all shall sing for humanity.  Today we're surrounded by a hellish darkness, There demons are playing destruction.  Hear, brave friends, through that deadly stillness! The paradise is calling at the horizon.  Hell-terror 'll be blown with our last breath,  Built in our lives will arise the Heaven! There Life will flourish from the bosom of death,  In his voice will ring the song of Human!  No danger or obstacle will stop us, Our head 'll be lowered by no injustice! With our blood we'll wipe all stigmas,  A new, unblemished world will arise!  Come, ye lives passed through dark night! Come, ye lives free from fear and cruelty! Come, in that dreamland let's unite, There we all shall sing for humanity! First published in Bookosmia

The Eyes of Light | The Life

  Glimpses from everyday life, designed with pictures.  Check it out! ■ When you heat a piece of glass, it doesn't warm up too soon. It crackes when heated excessively, which can never be repaired. When you heat a piece of iron. it warms up too quickly. Even if it crackes in heat you can easily repair it. Don't suppress your emotions inside of you. Let them excite you. If you keep them suppressed. one day they'll make you snap, which is irreversible. So. Don't be like glass. Be like iron. ■ ■ Never let yourself be defeated inside of you. ■ ■ When your every instinct screams to do something, don't let anyone ar anything in the world restrain you from doing that. ■ ■ When you see somebody sad, try to to help him as much as you can. You'll never know, your slightest soothing touch, your smallest compassionate word is how much to trvaluable to some. ■ ■ There is no greater contentment than seeing a smile on somebody's face and knowing that it is you who has brou

Dream Of A Young Heart | A Letter Of A Young Girl

Written in May 2020 Dear professor Trilokeshwar Shanku, I have read your marvellous and incredible adventures. You are my icon, my inspiration– I have been inspired by your stories to be a great scientist like you. I wonder why people believe that you are an imaginary character. My strong belief is that there is a replica of the solar system in somewhere of this great universe –  including a planet which is exactly alike our Earth– except some people, places, things and animals– that people include you, your friend Jeremy Saunders, Wilhelm Chroll, John Summervile, Hugo Dumberton, Francis Fielding, Abinash Mazumdar, Nakur Chandra Biswas– that things include your inventions like miracurall, annihilin pistol, air-conditioning pill, remembrain, ceribrilant, luminimax, compudium, neo-specteroscope, microsonograph, omniscope, camerapid, linguagraph, and so more– that animals include autoplasm and E.A. Today, I am writing you this letter to make some wishes to you. I hope you will fulfill tho